Escaped My Ex, Got Snatched by His Rival - Chapter 365

Chapter 365: Liberation (2)
Child?

Why the fuck she suddenly imagined a black-haired and ruby-eyed child running in front of her? And why the hell did she think that the girl was going to be as good-looking as Nicolai?

Does this mean that she wanted to give Nicolai a child?

Was she even allowed to have a child when she was broken like this? What if she hurt them? How could she even imagine a normal life?

‘You are a jinx Ariana. No one will love you.’

‘A monster, that’s what you are. Do you think that you deserve anything nice? Children like you are locked up in asylum, Ariana. I love you which is why I am keeping you here —you should thank me,’

‘Be Always grateful to me, Ari.’

‘I am your saviour.’

‘Ultimately, you will be abandoned.’

“What?” Ari snapped out of her daze, the confusion in her eyes cleared up, and the adrenaline washed off. She immediately sobered up. She looked around the bedroom and her reality came crashing.

“No—I can’t hurt him… I can’t do that to him,” she muttered before sliding off the bed. Her legs were trembling so badly that she could not even stand up. It took a while before she snatched her clothes off the floor.

And once she was done putting them on, she walked out of the penthouse as quickly as possible. However, as soon as she stepped out, Ari turned and looked at the door which she had closed behind her.

Though she had several thoughts, she couldn’t, despite coming this far, break past the last hurdle.

Hide. Stay away from him. Pretend as if this never happened. This way she would keep him happy—after all, she was like a ticking bomb, in the words of her father and a monster according to her mother.

Nicolai deserved better than her —and not a flawed product.

If he was dragged down by her, he would only be filled with unhappiness and resentment. And in the end, she would be abandoned.

Like always. Because Ari knew that she was challenging to love.

The ink-like tendrils swooped from the ground and stroked her head almost caressing her.

A surge of nausea rushed up her throat, which only intensified when she saw Nicolai walking back to his apartment while she hid in the parking lot.

Ari took one last look at the man who made her heart ache differently before she turned around on her feet and walked away, feeling like she had left a chunk of her soul behind.

************

Ari dropped the brush in her hand on the ground with a clatter. She could not sleep last night, for the first time in her entire life, she was let down by her biological clock. Forget about sleeping, she couldn’t even close her eyes.

Because each time she closed her eyes, she would be reminded of the damage she had left on a man. Back then with Noah, she was confident in her control.

That was because Noah only evoked one emotion —gratitude.

Nicolai, on the other hand, pulled and wrenched out a bunch of them.

So last night, she spent the entire night tossing and turning, she took seven cold dips in the small bathtub. Drank chamomile tea like she had been given a lifetime supply of them.

In the end, she was left with no other choice but to paint. And she painted until she could no longer, but that only made everything worse. She stared at the canvas in front of her. It was laden with heavy dark colours, with grim reapers and crows surrounding a woman who was smiling giddily as the crows nipped at her flesh.

Liberation.

That was what Ariana had called it.

The painting did little to nothing to get those inky tendrils to let go of her hands and feet. All pleasure and happiness that Ari had felt last night were butchered by them.

Now she sat alone in this very room while battling with her own head.

What made you think that you could even live a normal life?

You are fucking flawed, Ari. Filled with them.

Look at your hands, they are covered with blood.

He will abandon you just like everyone. A monster like you, do you think he will be able to love you?

It’s just your body.

Despite the thoughts flooding in her head, and the blood-covered hand and face in the mirror— Ari still had a little hope in her heart. She looked down at her hand which was slightly red because of how hard she had been clutching the paintbrush.

“Stop it,” she told herself. “Death is not the answer. It will never be the answer.”

She stood up from the stool and covered the painting with an old bedsheet like many others.

Once she stepped out of the small painting room, she walked over to her room, where she washed the paint off and freshened up.

With Timmy’s leash in one hand, she stepped out of the apartment and suddenly the impact of how much she wanted to see Nicolai crashed in her heart as she actually locked her door in a hurry and strode out with a skip in her pace.

While Ari was skipping, there was someone who could not even stand on her feet.

“It’s him! It’s him!” In the hospital of Clover City, Penelope screeched at the top of her lungs. With a bandaged forehead and arm in a sling, she looked at her parents angrily, “It must be Nicolai, he should be behind my accident. Daddy, you have to think of something —look at him, he broke my arm and legs.”

“What if I am unable to walk anymore?” Penelope cried with tears in her eyes. Her face was swollen and aching, but she couldn’t stop herself from crying.

With her only limb intact, she picked up the vase on the cabinet next to her bed and threw it on the floor. “How can he treat me like this? For a woman of no background. I have liked him longer. Why? Why can’t he see me?” She started to cry with tears falling from her eyes like (cheap) pearls.