Gamer Superstar - Chapter 7

07 – Numb
Even though I was excited to record the song today, I still had to go about my normal routine until after I finished helping Ethan with his homework.

Surprisingly, with the help I’d given him these past few days, Ethan was starting to need less and less help.

As I helped him catch up a little on things he should have learned but hadn’t yet understood, now that he knew more about these things, it was much easier to teach him his homework since he already had the basis formed to learn these things.

Just like the other days, when I finished teaching Ethan his homework, I picked up my guitar and started tuning it.

I had already requested the copyright for the song I want to sing yesterday, which gives me the right to use that song from today onwards without any worries.

Of the $181 that I had saved, in the last few days I managed to sell enough artworks to raise $493, ​​and that’s because I only wanted to make two artworks a day, as the number of customers queuing up to get an artwork was increasing every day.

I even decided to increase the price for the next arts, but they still continued to queue, especially when they saw that my art was getting better and better as my Skill level rose and I got used to drawing this style of characters.

Of the $493 I had saved, I had to spend $130 to get the copyright for the song I was going to sing.

Thinking about how much money I could potentially earn from the video for this song, this was clearly a waste of money, but my focus would not be on the income I would earn from views of the video, but on how much I could earn later on from playing shows.

So, asking Ethan to stay downstairs with my mom, I finally started strumming my guitar, feeling the beat of the song I wanted to play.

I didn’t choose this song because it was the most successful song I knew, nor because it was the song that was most successful before I came into this world, but the song that most resonated with me in the most difficult times I went through. in my previous world.

And oddly enough, in the memories I reviewed of the old Noah from this world, if he had this song it would also have resonated very well with what he was going through here.

🎼🎶🎤

“I’m drained playing the role you expect…

Lost in the hush beneath the willow’s affect…”

🎼🎶🎤

When I started to sing this part, even after so long, I felt like my voice was getting heavier, while my nose was burning, but I still continued singing.

🎼🎶🎤

“Uncertain of the expectations you reflect…

Bearing the weight in shoes, your script has decked…”

🎼🎶🎤

Everything my father put me through, and everything I tried to do to get even the slightest bit of attention from him…

🎼🎶🎤

“Each step I take feels like an earth-shattering quake.

Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow

I’ve become so numb.

Can’t feel the drum.

Worn out and tired.

Much more inspired.

Transforming into this.

All I long to do.

Is be genuinely me.

And less like you.”

🎼🎶🎤

(NunuNote: You know what this song is, you also know why it’s different, I had to edit the song to make it more original, but the message the lyrics send is still the same XD)

When I finally sang the chorus of the song, I couldn’t help it and let the little drops of tears fall from my eyes.

I wanted to sing a more upbeat song, even a song about some heartbreak, since I wouldn’t be able to relate to it and I would be able to remain impartial, but something in me asked me to sing this song.

I had no idea where this desire to sing this song was coming from, until when I finished singing everything, I heard the sound of the door slowly opening.

Just like me, there was a crying face on the other side of the door, and then I finally understood why there was something in me wanting me to sing this.

This was the Noah of this world, who probably understood the lyrics to this song and knew that there was someone in this house who really needed a song like this.

And on the other side of the door was Olivia, crying as much as I was, looking at me with a mixture of anger and fear, that I could imagine where they were coming from.

Without saying anything, she just turns and runs to her room, without having the slightest idea of ​​how to control the feeling that was probably exploding in her chest at that moment.

[New Skill Unlocked]

—— Olivia’s Pov 5 Minutes Ago ——

I think it’s been about 5 days since I’ve been feeling a change in Noah.

Before he was just a weird kid who stayed in his room all day watching those Japanese cartoons, but now he was different…

From what I heard, every day he’s waking up with my dad to have breakfast with him, he’s going to exercise twice every day… damn, I don’t even like exercising and he’s that size and he’s doing it twice a day?

Now I have to admit, his exercises are already paying off.

At first I didn’t notice anything different, but today I was shocked when I saw the difference between how he looks and a photo we have on the wall!

While in the photo on the wall he had dirty hair, messy clothes and an uncomfortable expression on his face, the current Noah has a much better haircut, he speaks with more confidence and he must be at least 10 kg lighter !

Sure, he’s still very fat, but compared to how he was before, it’s already a great change.

But what surprised me even more was how he was acting like Ethan and my mother.

Apparently, Noah has been helping Ethan with his homework for 5 days, and it looks like Ethan can now do almost everything on his own!

Everyone at home had already tried to help Ethan with his homework, even me, but no one was able to, now how was Noah managing?

That’s what I was thinking too with how he was acting towards my mother, since every time I see that she’s about to freak out at him, the same way she freaks out at me, somehow he manages to calm her down and everything is fine.

That hurricane she throws at me when I do something she doesn’t like, that never happens to him.

‘Does she really like him more than me?’ I sighed as I thought about the difference between the way she treated me and him.

At that moment I passed in front of Noah’s room, which if it were a normal day, I would probably bet that he was watching some Japanese cartoon, but since he looks different, I was a little worried about what he could be doing now.

‘Did he watch those cartoons again?’ I asked myself as I chuckled.

With my curiosity kicking in, I decided to go near Noah’s door to see what he was doing.

To my surprise, I heard the sound of a guitar being played inside.

At first I thought he was just practicing some music, since I heard Ethan going on and on a few days ago about how he wanted Noah to play more guitar for him.

Imagine my surprise when I discovered that Noah knew how to play the guitar?

I didn’t even know he had a guitar!

But I was a little embarrassed to ask and I kept exchanging messages with my friends and ignoring it.

At the moment the only thing I thought was that Noah probably didn’t even know what he was doing with the guitar, right? Since I’ve never seen him training this.

But I was wrong.

Seriously, the music I was listening to from inside the room was really cool, even without knowing how to play the guitar, it seemed like something quite difficult, a riff that only someone with a little experience would know how to play.

But what surprised me was when he started singing.

🎼🎶🎤

“I’m drained, playing the role you expect…”

🎼🎶🎤

Hearing him sing this line, I was initially surprised, as his singing voice was better than I imagined, but I didn’t feel anything special.

🎼🎶🎤

“Lost in the hush beneath the willow’s affect…”

🎼🎶🎤

Listening to this other part, I just kept paying attention to his voice, as these parts of songs with very deep thoughts didn’t really matter to me, but the next line made me a little uncomfortable.

🎼🎶🎤

“Uncertain of the expectations you reflect…”

“Bearing the weight in shoes, your script has decked…”

🎼🎶🎤

When I heard that last line, I finally understood what this song was talking about, and damn, that shit hit me hard…

The first thing I visualized when I heard this part was my mother, always trying to make me be the perfect girl, make me the little daughter that no one can criticize…

🎼🎶🎤

“Each step I take feels like an earth-shattering quake…”

🎼🎶🎤

Hearing this part made me think about every difficulty I had when trying to do something different from what she asked, it really was as if every step I took was like an earthquake…

Who sang this song? How have I never heard this before?! If I knew this song it would definitely be playing in my headphones all the time, especially when I was with her…

🎼🎶🎤

“I’ve become so numb

Can’t feel the drum

Worn out and tired

Much more inspired

Transforming into this

All I long to do

Is be genuinely me

And less like you…”

🎼🎶🎤

That chorus of the song… damn, not only did it sound great, I started to understand why I probably didn’t know this song.

This was done by him, right?

Haha…

Since when did my idiot brother have such a talent for music, and probably no one in this house knew?

But… how did he write this song? He doesn’t even suffer what I suffer in this house.

Everything he did was always applauded, or at least ignored, me? Everything I did wrong was always criticized until the end.

Even when I thought I was doing something right, it was like in the end I messed up and in her view I was wrong…

Wait!

He wrote this song for me, right?

If it wasn’t for me, at least he watched me write this… it could only have been that!

Is he really the only one who understands me in this house?

But he never did anything to try to help me…

I didn’t even notice when tears started falling down my face, but I just ignored it and continued listening to this song from behind his bedroom door.

🎼🎶🎤

“Struggling within shadows where doubt takes flight

Chasing dreams in someone else’s light…”

🎼🎶🎤

When I heard this part, the first thing I remembered was the violin performance she forced me to go to when I was younger, even though I didn’t like it, I was too young to understand that she wasn’t doing it for I liked it, but it was to make her dream come true!

🎼🎶🎤

“Lost in the silence where emotions alight

Trading truth for lies in this scripted night”

🎼🎶🎤

Damn Noah… holy shit, how long have you watched me go through this alone and done nothing?!

Damn, on the one hand I’m glad someone finally noticed this about me, but to write such profound lyrics, he had to have watched me suffer for a long time, right?

Was he using me as a guinea pig for his music?

Suddenly, while I was crying and leaning against the door, apparently the door wasn’t locked and it opened…

Looking at Noah, who was also crying inside the room, a part of me was a little happy, but I was still angry, so I just turned around and ran back to my room, the only place I had a little bit of peace in this house.

As I ran to my room, I passed my mother, who was carrying some laundry.

I don’t even know if she saw I was crying, but I tried my best to hide the crying as I ran to my room and locked the door.

‘Crap!’ I thought irritated.

I don’t know what’s going on…

My chest hurts so much…