Tangled in Moonlight: Unshifted - Chapter 399

Chapter 399: Ava: Magic Awareness
I slap my forehead. “Son of a bitch!”

The attack on Ivy’s people. The possibility of corruption in our pack. Both conversations I needed to have with Lucas slip through my fingers like water. My teeth catch my inner cheek as I consider his current load—the president’s assassination, the supernatural reveal, our tenuous position in this world.

I guess I can wait a little.

“Something wrong?” Grimoire floats upside down in front of me, his red hair touching the ground.

“Just remembered I need to talk to Lucas about Ivy and the corruption.” I release my cheek with a sigh. “But with everything happening right now…”

“Ah. Perhaps waiting until tonight or tomorrow would be wiser. The situation with the government takes precedence.”

“My thoughts exactly.” I rub my temples. “Speaking of Ivy though—how long would we need to spend around her to get familiar with whatever’s happening there? To really understand what we’re dealing with?”

Grimoire’s begins to slowly circle in midair, his hair oddly hypnotizing as it obeys gravity. “I cannot even begin to guess. The nature of corruption is… unpredictable. What manifests in one person might present entirely differently in another. We can only start by trying.”

A grimace pulls at my lips. The prospect of spending extended time with Ivy, watching and waiting for signs of something amiss, makes my stomach turn. But if there’s even a chance she’s been touched by the taint…

“Wonderful,” I mutter. “Just wonderful.”

You should keep an eye on her anyway. Selene’s disgruntled mood is clear, her mind voice more of a grumble than anything else.

“I know, I know. I can’t bring her with me, but at least between purifications…” My fingers tap against my thigh as I consider the logistics. “I could invite her to help with the refugees, I guess. That’s what she would be doing anyway.”

But the thought of purification snags in my mind like a hook. Obviously, I can purify Ivy now. But if I do that, I lose my chance at recognizing this low-level corruption among others in my pack.

“Does it make me a bad person? To let her suffer just so I can figure out what corruption looks like in others?”

Grimoire stops his slow rotation, hanging upside down again with his eyes fixed on mine. “She isn’t suffering yet. She’s the ideal test subject.”

“When you put it that way, it sounds worse.” My fingers twist in the hem of my shirt. “But if there’s even a chance others are corrupted… if we can learn what to look for…”

It’s practical, Selene offers. But you’re asking the wrong question.

“What do you mean?”

The real question isn’t whether you’re a bad person. It’s whether you can live with the consequences of your choice.

“Consider this,” Grimoire says, finally righting himself. “What would Ivy choose, if given the option? To be purified immediately, or to help protect the pack by allowing us to study the corruption’s effects?”

“That’s not fair. She’d choose to help the pack because that’s what she thinks will prove her loyalty. She’d martyr herself for a chance at acceptance.”

But then I feel like shit for saying that, because… well, my issues with her aside, Ivy’s always been devoted to her pack. I shake my head. “No. She would do it because it’s the right thing to do.”

Then perhaps you should respect that choice.

“But it’s not her choice if we don’t tell her, Selene.”

Grimoire shrugs. He’s already upside down again. “The fact that you’re struggling with this decision speaks volumes, Ava. A truly bad person wouldn’t care about the moral implications.”

“Or maybe I’m just trying to justify doing something terrible by feeling bad about it.” I press my palms against my eyes. “We should tell her. We already know what she’s going to say, right? So we don’t lose out on anything. I can’t just not tell her.”

I don’t like her very much, but what’s wrong is still wrong.

She’ll probably take credit, Selene warns me.

“That’s fine. She will deserve it this time.”

A weight lifts from my shoulders. The decision feels right, even if it means giving up tactical advantages. Some things just aren’t worth the cost to my conscience.

I suppose.

Grimoire drifts closer to Selene, floating just above her head as he pokes at her ears. “Those missing memories of yours are quite fascinating.”

Her ears flatten against her skull. No.

“Come now, surely you’re curious about what you’ve forgotten? About your connection to these divine artifacts?”

I said no.

“Just a tiny peek? For science?”

For science? Really? Selene’s tail lashes back and forth. That’s the best you can do?

“Would you prefer ‘for the good of all mankind’?”

I prefer you stay out of my head.

I sink into the nearest chair, watching them like a tennis match. The bickering is almost… comforting. Normal. A break from all the heavy decisions weighing on us.

“But think of all we could learn!” Grimoire spreads his arms wide. “The secrets of the past, the true nature of your bond with Ava—”

The true nature of my foot up your—

“Selene!” I bite back a laugh. “Be nice.”

He started it.

Grimoire floats upside down again, his hair defying gravity this time. “I merely suggested a perfectly reasonable course of action.”

Reasonable? You want to go poking around in my head!

“Well, it’s not like you’re using all of it.”

Selene’s growl fills the room. I will bite you.

“You can’t bite a spirit.”

I can bite you as a book.

“Children,” I interrupt, unable to keep the smile from my voice. “Play nice.”

Grimoire rights himself with a dramatic sigh. “I’m simply saying, if there are memories lost, they might be important ones.”

They’re still my memories, Selene snaps. Mine. Not yours to rifle through like old newspapers.

“But—”

No.

“What if—”

Also no.

“You’re being unreasonable.”

You’re being pushy.

I lean back, crossing my arms. “You know, Selene, he does have a point. Those memories could be important.”

Not you too. Her head droops, betrayal echoing through our bond. I thought you were on my side.

“I’m always on your side. But that doesn’t mean I can’t see his point too.”

Grimoire preens. “Thank you, Ava.”

Fine. You want to know what’s in my head? Selene bares her teeth. Mostly it’s ways to make you disappear.

“How creative of you.” Grimoire circles her slowly. “But surely there must be something else in there. Something about the Goddess, perhaps.”

I press my fingers to my temples. “You two are giving me a headache.”

He started it, Selene repeats, but there’s less heat in it now.

“And I’m finishing it.” I fix them both with what I hope is a stern look. “Grimoire, stop pushing. Selene, stop antagonizing him.”

They both manage to look somewhat chastened. For about three seconds.

“But if we just—”

Touch my memories and die.

So much for that.

A flutter ripples through my magic, like a bird testing its wings. The sensation distracts me from Selene and Grimoire’s bickering.

“Do you feel that?” My hand presses against my sternum.

Grimoire pauses his orbit around Selene’s head. “Feel what?”

“My magic. It’s… moving.” The flutter comes again, stronger this time. Not unpleasant, just strange. Like bubbles rising in champagne. “Is that normal?”

“Define moving.” Grimoire drifts closer, peering at my chest as if he could see through it.

“Like butterfly wings. Or maybe…” I search for the right words. “Like when your stomach drops on a roller coaster, except it’s not my stomach. It’s my magic.”

“Ah.” He nods, floating back. “Your awareness is increasing.”

The flutter comes again, stronger this time. “But why now? I’ve been using magic for weeks.”

“And purifying corruption for days. That’s intensive work, requiring precise control and awareness. It’s natural your sensitivity would increase.”

“So nothing’s wrong?”

“Nothing at all. Though you might start noticing other sensations as your awareness grows. Temperature changes, pressure differences, that sort of thing.”

I rub my chest where the feeling is strongest. “Will it always feel this… obvious?”

“You’ll get used to it. Like background noise or the weight of clothes against your skin. Though you might want to pay attention to any dramatic changes. Your magic could be trying to tell you something.”

“Great. More cryptic magical messages to decipher.”

At least these ones don’t involve ancient artifacts, Selene offers, apparently done sulking.

“Small mercies.” The flutter settles into a gentle pulse, barely noticeable now that I’m not focusing on it. “Is this what you feel all the time, Grimoire?”

“No. You’re probably feeling it moving inside of you. Even when you aren’t using it, there’s always a bit of circulation going on. It doesn’t just sit there.”

That’s something I already knew; I can sense it when I meditate.

“Your sensitivity will continue to develop,” Grimoire says.

The flutter picks up again, like my magic knows we’re talking about it. “Will it affect my control?”

“Only positively. The more aware you are of your magic, the more precisely you can direct it.” He demonstrates by creating a tiny ball of light that dances between his fingers.

“That makes sense.” I watch the light show, noting how smoothly it moves. I can’t replicate that. “Though I could do without the constant reminder that I’m basically a magical battery.”

Grimoire snorts. “You’re far more than that.”

“Yeah?” The flutter intensifies, almost like agreement. Is it possible for magic to have personality? Because I swear mine does. “What am I then?”

“A work in progress.” He grins at my mock glare. “But one with tremendous potential.”