The Alpha's Fated Outcast: Rise Of The Moonsinger. - Chapter 136

Chapter 136: Balance is a myth…
Ramsey

We arrived at White Lake Pack a few minutes later.

Elder Thorne had come out to welcome us and immediately offered to take Nathan to where Lyla was. I and the priestess followed behind walking at a normal pace when I saw her slow down and wait for me until we were walking side by side.

“You remind me so much of your parents, Lycan Leader,” she said softly, her eyes glazing wistfully as she gave me a small smile.

I turned to her, momentarily surprised that she was bringing my parents up suddenly. “You knew my parents?” I asked.

She nodded, her smile growing into a wide grin now. “Who didn’t?” she chuckled. “I knew them very well; they were extraordinary and one of the best couples our world has ever seen. They were brave, loyal and deeply in love. They had one of the most intense mate bonds I’ve ever seen despite being born into different worlds. They existed peacefully and we all knew they would never be able to survive without each other. On the day of their Joining Ceremony, their wish was to die together.”

I let out a bitter laugh as my steps slowed. “Brave, loyal and deeply in love,” I repeated sarcastically. “If they were so obsessed with each other, why did they even bother to have a child? I clearly was a hassle to them or an inconvenience, they couldn’t have birthed me at all because I never meant anything to them.”

The priestess sighed. “Life is rarely fair,” she said gently. “No matter how much we wish it were otherwise, it never is. Balance is a myth we tell ourselves to make sense of the chaos. I’m sure your parents loved you in their own way, but their love for each other was so overwhelming that it consumed everything else. Nothing is ever truly even.”

“I’ve seen how parents obessess with their children. They want to spend every waking moment with them but I didn’t have that luxury. I was raised by nannies and maids and the Butler. Whenever my dad was not working, he was always with my mom… they did everything together – the only time they were my parents was during compulsory family events and my mom… would brush my head and give me a smile then complains to the maids that I looked thin or the clothes I had on wasn’t the right size and that was all. And my dad…”

I trailed off with a scoff. “He’ll pat me on my shoulders and say ‘That’s my boy’. Lenny’s mother would not let him leave the house to play without dressing him with all the safety gadgets in the world. She would cook for him, pack his food – she wasn’t a great cook and she was my mother’s Beta but she never allowed her busy schedule to be in the way of taking care of her son. My parents had no excuse for acting like literal pricks to me.”

She stopped walking, her hands reached out to touch my arm, the gesture forcing me to turn and face her as her eyes bored into mine. I saw pity in them.

“It’s time to forgive your parents,” she said firmly.

“There’s no need for that. They weren’t my parents long enough for me to forgive them. They died and left me so why should I bother? Do you know what it’s like to grow up knowing you’ll always come second to something you can’t compete with? It eats at you but that was my reality at 6. I learnt from an early age that I’ll never be a priority.”

“Still, you’re hanging on to the hurt,” she said quietly “I know their choices left scars on you, but you have to let it go for your sake. It’s blocking your path, interfering with meaningful relationships. At least for your sake do it and not for theirs.”

I didn’t say anything.

She would never understand and I was tired of explaining myself. So, I exhaled sharply and resumed walking. We walked together side by side until she broke the silence again.

“Would you like to help Lyla instead of Alpha Nathan? I’m sure he won’t object if I tell him.”

I shook my head. “No!”

She glanced at me, her brow arching slightly. “How long are you going to deny the mate bond between you and Lyla? The red thread of fate between you and her is so potent, even the short break you took didn’t change anything.”

I let out a weary sigh. “I’m not denying it anymore,” I admitted. “Lyla doesn’t want to be with me. She’s made that clear enough.”

Before the priestess could comment on that, I hurriedly cut her off and continued. “It’s fine. I’ve let her go. She wants to be with Nathan and I want her to be happy. That’s all that matters.”

“How about what you want?” The Priestess asked softly.

I opened my mouth to speak and then shook my head, attempting a smile. “I was taught that my wants and needs comes last. My priority is to this world and the safety of all the packs and the people. When everyone is safe, I’ll be happier.”

The Priestess sighed shaking her head “You’re still too young to play burden bearer, Ramsey. Can’t you fix whatever the problem is with you and Lyla… she’ll need you by her side eventually.”

“I…” I paused, a sad smile tugging at the corners of my lips. “I have never made her happy… I never make her happy,” I said with resignation. “No matter what I do, no matter how much I try to remind myself that she’s the one for me, whenever she’s with me, she’s miserable. We fight more than we talk and…” I swallowed hard. “I’ve seen how she smiles and laughs around Nathan. She lights up with him in a way she never does with me.”

“Maybe both of you need to sit down and talk things out.”

I chuckled. “We’ve done that several times and each time we meet, we reject each other again. I always end up saying the wrong words, words she doesn’t want to hear but it’s fine. I’ve resigned myself to my fate. I just hope she gets the love she truly deserves with Nathan.”

“You won’t last with Cassidy,” the priestess sighed. “Your marriage is not going to be favourable. Would you rather live with that for the rest of your life? Your laws about divorce are stricter than Werewolves and none of the Lycan Leaders before you have ever needed to divorce their mates. Are you ready to put up with that?”

“I’m used to all sorts of loneliness, Mother Liora,” I said quietly. “The only person that matters to me more than my grandfather right now is Lyla and since she’s fine, I can withstand any other thing. As for Cassidy… we’ll be fine. I just need to pay more attention to her and put up with her antics but she listens to me though. Everything will work out eventually.”

The priestess exhaled deeply and then nodded. “Soon, the Ferals would be a thing of the past. Lyla will heal our world. Don’t worry, I know she’s yet to fully accept it but I’m sure after she comes back things will change and Nathan moved up his coronation to keep her here.”

I nodded and we continued walking in silence.

As we reached the door to Lyla’s room, I remembered there was something I’d been dying to find out from the priestess. The more I thought about it, the more it worried me and I needed to know if it wasn’t just me seeing it.

“Mother Liora!” I called her to her quietly.

She turned to face me. “Yes, Alpha!”

“There’s something I’ve been wondering about,” I said tentatively.

“Go ahead,” she encouraged.

I nodded, hesitating for a moment before speaking. “Is Miriam … and Lyla related in another way other than her being her nanny?”

The Priestess’s expression didn’t change but her eyes seemed to darken with an emotion I couldn’t quite place. She looked at me for a long while before finally replying.

“Is there any other way a Nanny is supposed to be related to a child they cared for?”

“That’s not what I mean,” I sighed. “Lyla looks so much like Miriam. They even have the same mole on the back of the ears and I know two people can have close resemblance but not to this extent. I noticed it that day you arrived at White Moon with her. I thought she was Lyla.”

“They don’t look so alike, Ramsey. If they do, that means Neriah would have two reincarnations. I assure you they don’t.”

“I know… I know but… they just feel like there’s more going on. I had Nannies, and…”

“Sometimes,” The Priestess interrupted me her lips curving into a faint, enigmatic smile. “Answers come when we’re ready to hear them. I’m sure whatever you seek to know now will be revealed to you in the nearest future. For now, let’s concentrate on brining Lyla back to us.”